Voices of Men

Marc Brink told how at the age of 13 he witnessed his father knock his mother unconscious.  Marc laid on the floor motionless pretending to sleep.  Marc was scared as his dad paced the room smoking a cigarette.  By standing over Marc, his dad knew he had Marc’s silence.  As Marc grew older and witnessed this repeatedly, he told his dad that this cannot continue to happen.  He took his mother and 10 year old brother out of the house.  This ended the cycle of violence in his family and Marc vowed to no longer remain silent.

Josh Puls discussed how Voices of Men is a group of Fox Valley men dedicated to changing the attitudes and actions of men and boys that contribute to the abuse of women and girls. Voices of Men started in 2007 when 4 agencies, Sexual Assault Crisis Center, Harbor House Domestic Abuse Services, Reach Counseling Services and Christine Ann Domestic Abuse Services, got together in an effort to engage men in the solution to end abuse against women and girls.  Together these agencies brought a nationally acclaimed performance entitled “Voices of Men” to 600 high school students and 130 community leaders.  The four agencies then sponsored a “Men’s Summit” in October to gain support of local men in affecting change in our own communities.  This event led to the formation of Fox Valley Voices of Men.  In January 2010, 400 men attended the first breakfast event in Neenah.  The goal is to focus on changing the mindset and behavior over the long term through education, awareness and action.  When men are ready they are asked to take the White Ribbon Pledge – I pledge to never commit, condone or remain silent about men’s violence against women and girls.  There are 10 things men can do to end violence against women.  1.  Break out of the man box and challenge traditional images of manhood that keep you from taking a stand.  2.  Ask how you can help if you suspect abuse or an assault.  3.  Teach your children that “no” means “no”.  4. Don’t buy the argument that sexual and domestic violence are due to mental illness, lack of anger management skills, chemical dependency, stress or other excuses.  5.  Stand up and speak out because silence affirms and supports sexual and domestic violence.  6.  Look in the mirror and ask if your own attitudes and actions help support the objectification and de-valuing of women and girls.  7.  Be a model for youth.  8.  Educate yourself as well as listen and learn from women.  9. Step up and create a culture shift that doesn’t tolerate disrespecting or degradation of women. 10. Host a video, discussion or presenter through work, school, church, service club or sports team. The Fox Valley Voices of Men 3^rd Annual Breakfast will be held on Wednesday, June 13 from 7:00-9:00 a.m. at the Radisson Paper Valley Hotel.  Ted Bunch, “A Call to Men”, will be the speaker.  You can register at www.voicesofmen.com.  When the time comes and you see abuse happening, will you speak? If you remain silent you give these men the power.  You can say something as simple as, “That makes me feel uncomfortable?”  Help Fox Valley Voices of Men end violence again women and girls.